


Mid-winter Dance

by Adina



Category: Vorkosigan Saga - Lois McMaster Bujold
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-12-22
Updated: 2003-12-22
Packaged: 2018-01-25 08:09:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1640645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Adina/pseuds/Adina
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ivan is a confused young man.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Mid-winter Dance

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Vyola

 

 

Ivan was dancing with Lady Donna at the emperor's Midwinter Festival, and that was wrong, though he couldn't remember why. 

They were dancing the waltz, a dance he'd learned on old Earth, and that was wrong too: his mother would never allow a dance so indecorous during any ball held under her auspices. Couples embraced and drifted around the great ballroom to the stately strains of a composer long dead before Barrayar had been colonized and then lost. Out of the corner of his eye he saw other couples entwined in the dance: his mother and Simon, Aunt Cordelia and Uncle Aral, Miles and Mark, Gregor and Laisa.... 

No, Miles and Mark weren't waltzing, but rather dancing a mirror dance in a world all their own, reflections of each other in a fun-house mirror. Looking down at Lady Donna's face, too strong for beauty and yet beautiful all the same, he nodded towards them. "Isn't that just like my cousin?" he asked. "My cousins, I suppose I should say. Neither Miles nor Mark could ever do anything _normal_." 

"I've always admired that in Miles," Lord Dono said. "His ability to take what he wants from life." Perhaps to illustrate this point, he smoothly took the lead from Ivan, subtly directing him off the dance floor and into the shadowed niches seemingly designed for lovers' trysts. Pressing Ivan against the wall he kissed him, a deep, exploratory affair, no dry social peck. He was taller than Ivan, and that was ridiculous: the Betan surgeons hadn't added any height when they changed his sex. They couldn't--if such a thing were possible Miles would have heard of it by now and would have grafted on another couple of feet of height. 

Ivan leaned into the kiss. Dono was still the accomplished kisser that Donna had once been, even though his beard pricked against Ivan's chin. His armsman shouldn't have let him come to the emperor's ball without shaving again in the evening. Szabo was a better conspirator than batsman, it appeared, or maybe the Betan surgeons had gone overboard with Dono's new balls. Ivan grinned and Dono pulled back. 

"What's so funny?" he demanded. 

Ivan kept grinning, amused by the memory. "I bet your balls aren't quite as...undersized...as they were when you first got back from Beta Colony." Lord Dono had changed into a Vorrutyer house uniform in front of him when he first returned, possibly to embarrass him as one of Lady Donna's former lovers, more probably so he could bear witness to his/her change. His...equipment...had been still growing at the time, leaving him a bit under-endowed. 

Dono leered. "Would you like to see for yourself?" he said, hands going to his trouser buttons. Suddenly they were in Donna's bedroom, with the lady herself standing in front of him, though she still wore Dono's uniform. She unbuttoned the trousers and let them slide to the floor, revealing a man-sized cock and pair of balls. Stepping forward she put her arms around him, her cock pressing against his. "This is what you want," she whispered in his ear. "Isn't it?" 

Ivan woke with a jolt, dream-memories making his erection--his perfectly normal, healthy, reflexive, it-doesn't-mean-anything, normal morning erection--acutely embarrassing. Lord Dono? Sorry, _Count Vorrutyer_? Himself and Count Vorrutyer? Dreaming about Donna, now that he could understand. He'd even thought of marrying her before she came back from Beta Colony and he'd been presented with...Dono. _Dono_ was engaged to marry one of the interchangeable Koudelka sisters--Olivia--within the year. Of course Ivan had also dated most of the Koudelka sisters, including Olivia, at one time or another, which was several kinds of unfair. 

Fury jumped up on the bed and--in defiance of her name and heritage--settled demurely on top of his chest. Miles had finally succeeded in pawning off one of Zap the Cat's numerous offspring on him. Without conscious thought his hand rose to rub the half-grown cat's ears. Fury rewarded him with an enthusiastic purr and a playful attempt to bite his finger. 

He needed to find a girlfriend, that was all. Or preferably a fiance. He wasn't fey, no matter what his dreams might suggest. Last week he had dreamed of a lake of egg custard, and he didn't even _like_ egg custard, let alone wanting to swim in the blasted stuff. 

His right hand crept down under the covers to his dick, while he firmly distracted the kitten with the other, since she was at the age when moving body parts under the covers where still legal targets. Donna's face drifted back into his mind's eye, only to metamorphose into Dono's features. Banishing Dono's image, he pumped his cock harder and tried to think of a past lover who wasn't married, engaged, or turned into a man. 

Donna was no more, she might as well have been dead. Laisa was his empress now, Olivia was engaged to Dono, Delia to Duv Galeni, Kareen was hanging around Mark--who was not only his cousin, but a trained and not-quite-sane killer--and even Martya was going after that damn bug-breeder of Mark's. Pumping harder he tried to think of someone else, anyone else. The ghem-ladies he had met on Cetaganda were beautiful enough, but he shuddered to remember their rapacious demands. Dono's face returned to haunt him again, only to be firmly banished once more. 

His erection flagged and softened, no matter how hard he pumped or what tricks he tried to increase his pleasure. He needed someone safe to fantasize about, or even better, a partner to make sex more than a solitary sport. Even Miles--even Mark!--had found someone. 

He needed to find another girlfriend, someone available and willing and interested in a rising young captain at headquarters. With his mother still distracted by Simon, she was no longer reading the Vor vital statistics to him with his morning coffee, so he no longer knew which ones were still available, especially among those old enough to have a little sense. He should ask Dono if any of Lady Donna's friends might be interested. 

 


End file.
